In an unexpected act of goodwill, Vice President Kamala Harris extended a hand of peace to former President Donald Trump by gifting him a sleek, retro electronic pager. The gesture, intended to ease tensions after the *second* assassination attempt on Trump this year, was met with confusion by Trump, who reportedly asked, “What do I do with this, order a pizza?”

However, what seemed like a nostalgic nod to the ’90s took a dark turn when, just hours later, reports surfaced that hundreds of similar pagers exploded across the Middle East, maiming and killing dozens of terrorists. The cause of the explosions remains unclear, but rumors have circulated that the pagers were booby-trapped with explosives by Israel as part of a covert anti-terrorism operation.

“Pure coincidence,” a spokesperson for the White House commented when asked about the bizarre connection between the Harris-Trump gift and the sudden carnage overseas. “The Vice President simply wanted to give Mr. Trump something he could understand.”

Meanwhile, Trump took to social media to thank Harris for the “peace pager” and added, “Nobody gives better gifts than me. But I appreciate the effort. Nice try, Kamala.”

International experts, however, are scratching their heads over the sheer improbability of the event. “We’ve seen many things in geopolitics, but pagers turning into explosives? That’s a new one,” said an anonymous source close to the CIA.

Israeli officials neither confirmed nor denied their involvement, but Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu was seen smirking during a press conference when asked about the incident. “Sometimes, the smallest gifts leave the biggest impact,” he remarked cryptically.

As of now, the Secret Service has advised Trump to “handle with care” any future peace offerings.