Andrew Luck preemptively retires to avoid awkward White House invitation if he wins Super Bowl

Colts at Redskins 09/16/18
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Andrew Luck shocked the football world by retiring in the middle of pre-season. Furious Colts fans booed Luck during his preseason game, but later he explained that the pressure of a possible future White House invitation after winning the Super Bowl was more than he could handle.

“I’m having anxiety attacks like 2-3 times per week,” said a sullen Luck. “I mean, if we win the Super Bowl, of course we’ll get invited to the White House. Do I go? Do I not go? What if I want to go? I think maybe I do. But will my teammates force me not to go? What if I go anyway? What does that say about me? And there’s a pretty good chance they’ll have McDonald’s or Chik fil. And I love that stuff. As you can see, this is really stressing me out. I think it would be best for me and for the Colts organization if I step away from the game I love and relieve this overwhelming stress.”


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